Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Handshake Etiquette - Part 5 - Final notes

The way someone gives a handshake is an indication of how he or she sees you. If a person gives you a dominating handshake, that person believes that they better than you in some way. If a person gives you a submissive handshake, he or she believes that you are better than they are. A neutral handshake shows equality.

To build confidence you need to know which handshake to use and when. Handshakes are your first impression and they provide an insight to your confidence level. If it is important to show the other person that you are confident, have self-respect and that you consider yourself an equal, you will have to become comfortable with using more dominating and neutral handshakes.

In building self- confidence, it is also important to learn how to disarm a dominating handshake. Normal circumstances dictate that you will encounter situations where someone chooses to give you a dominating handshake confident but aggressive). You know what it means but, but you should also know how you can disarm it and take control. If someone gives you a dominating handshake, you can disarm it by doing the following:

  1. Use a double-handed handshake - Use both your hands to wrap his hand.

  2. Step into the handshake - When someone gives you a dominating handshake just step in with your left foot, give him the shake, turn his palm towards the ceiling and then step in closer. If you do this correctly and quickly, you can see that now you are dominating and he is submitting.

  3. Rest your left hand on his or her arm or shoulder. This action will take him or her by surprise, give you control and show that you have self-confidence.


Having said all this it is also important to know when not to disarm dominating handshake. The best example of when not to disarm a dominating handshake is when shaking hands with your boss.

The handshake is a gesture of mutual trust. It brings a stranger into your personal space and allows you both to feel more comfortable with each other. For that reason, your handshake should be as warm and respectful as you would want to receive one.

Copyright © 2010, Career Matters. All Rights Reserved.Permission to Reprint: This article may be reprinted, provided it appears in its entirety with the following attribution: Copyright © 2010, Career Matters. Reprinted by permission of Mary Salvino.